I apologize to my fervent readers for the delay in our Downin “day to day”. Life as it would seem has plunged the Mr. and I into a series of challenging events that take heap tons of time and energy away from the weekly indulgence of sharing our life with you all on the blog. A lot of prayer has been bombarding Heaven’s gates from both myself and countless others of our friends and family. So many things have happened since last posting so I’d like to share the untold stories of December leading up into the New Year.
December was a wonderful month filled with the end of my college courses, time spent with family, and time spent with each other. Although we dearly missed the Downin side of our family over the holidays, we enjoyed and cherished the memories spent in Florida with my family.
Previously, at the end of my second practicum, I had gotten into an automobile accident which damaged my car in several expensive ways. The air conditioning ceased to work, the front lights shattered, the front hood bent up to expose the side of the engine, and the automated window system became inactive. Needless to say, it was time in our book to start looking for a new car and not just any car. I wanted something that would keep me safe and something that we could continue to use once we start a family. My father and mother (bless their hearts) decided they would meet me halfway on the price for a new 2015 RAV 4. After months of researching and stressful visits to car lots, this was a Godsend and we gratefully excepted the kind gesture from my parents and thank God daily from relieving that stressful circumstance from our lives.
A day after we had signed the contract and other such paperwork for our RAV 4, Thomas (The Mr.) was on his way home from work driving his Chevy Impala and had a major collision with the person in front of him . The crash was intense enough to have the airbags deploy leaving my poor husband very shaken and sore. The car was not in any state to drive and had to be towed to the local Chevy dealer for further inspection. Thomas had to rent a car to get to and from work on time seeing as how our schedules did not seem flexible enough for carpooling. I would soon start internship and have a very early morning schedule. With all of this bogging down the later half of our lovely December, we decided it was time to do something fun and special together to get away from all the chaos. My dear cousin Joy and her husband Felipe suggested meeting halfway in Charleston, South Carolina for some quality time and a New Year celebration via a 20’s themed party held downtown. It was a refreshing time for both of us and we ended up not wanting to leave.
It was so extremely hard coming back to reality after our magical time exploring Charleston. We’d be coming back to our car issues and for me personally, internship. Internship has been a very rude awakening for me about how impossible it is to be the perfect teacher. I had gone into this huge life change off of my anxiety medication. The placement I was in sped up the process of a rapid plunge into anxiety depression with days and nights filled with panic attacks, loss of sleep and loss of appetite. I recognized how desperately I needed to return to my morning readings of the Word and seek the Lord out when I lie awake in bed unable to sleep. I’m becoming more rooted in the Lord’s promises and comfort, but transformation out of chronic worry is like walking through a long valley. It’s a slow process but a wonderfully humbling experience to kneel before God incredibly broken both physically and mentally. The Lord delivered me out of my hardship through the compassion of my supervisor who helped find me a new placement in a nurturing environment.
It was like the reset button had been pressed and I was still nervous but determined to make the gift of my second chance work out. I started in my new placement the last week of January and I feel like I belong in this classroom. My confidence in myself is slowly returning and I’m getting healthier from starting back on my medication in tandem with such a nurturing placement. There was a time during the first week in my first placement when I was seriously considering the option of quitting the program. I praise God for the second chance and for restoring my joy for the profession. Thank you all for your prayers and continual prayer. Your compassion is overwhelming and uplifting to both me and the Mr. I hope this encourages others walking through a valley right now. Even when you feel like your prayers are just hitting the ceiling and that your joy is completely bereft, keep seeking the Lord daily and find peace in His promises. His Word is truth and truth will change you if you believe and accept it. Till next post, stay strong in faith and abundant in joy.